Thursday, July 23, 2009

why am I still jealous?

I wish I could be at peace with the life I've already lived. It's already so much more than I ever expected to have.

I remember growing up being jealous of my sister only to discover that she had been jealous of me the whole time too. There's so much we could have helped each other through at home if we had been able to look past ourselves and care about each other.

I never think that my jealousy towards friends affects my friendships; but at some level, it has to.

I've been very non-committal in most of my friendships because of my fears of rejection and self-doubt, but someday I hope I can be a real friend to all the people I come in contact with. No more of this self-pity.

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